Well, not much has been happening this week. Baby’s getting fat. Hospital/Doctors’ bills keep trickling in one by one. Insurance fails to cover a MAJOR bill, so I have to call the insurance, they tell me to call the healthcare provider, they tell me to call the insurance and it goes on and on.
Today was a new day and yet a new bill. So as I open the envelope, I’m trying to guess how much we’re going to have to pay this time…Success!!! $17! “This must be a mistake” I think to myself. “What can anyone ever get for $17 anymore?” I thought it would be like the SATs in high school. You know, you get 500 points just for filling out your name correctly. I thought doctors’ offices charged you at least $50 just by walking through the door and then the bills keep going up. In fact, I am halfway convinced that the amount you pay is based on your waiting time and not the service that is provided. “Oh, you just want your blood pressure checked? Sure, no problem. Now, how long did you have to wait? 3 hours? Ooooh, okay. That’ll be $5,000.”
So eventually, we’ll get everything settled. The devil will have our child’s soul, but at least all of his hospital bills will be paid off. And that’s what’s MOST important. Yeah, we don’t need any healthcare reform. Speaking of reform, it’s truly amazing how so many people are pissed off/annoyed/ready to shoot someone over there coverage/cost/pains of going through the process but they don’t want anything to change. (Keep government out of my medicare!) “Hey, if the insurance companies will cover it, who cares how much it costs, right?!? Oh wait a minute, WE’RE the ones paying the insurance companies?!? Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. Shit.”
Anyways, sorry to get off on a pseudo-political rant. Well, no I’m not. Just try to remember-don’t get sick.
So Brianna and me are looking at lamebook when Brianna clicks on the large “next” button thinking this will take us to the next page. It would make sense, right? Click on “Next” to go to the next page. Nope. Wrong. It takes us to some awesome (and by awesome I mean shitty) ads instead.
B: “Awww, when did they start this shit?”
P: “About the same time the internet started.”
Last night, after a few frothy goodnesses, I finally came up with the grand idea of keeping a notepad near the couch in case we said or did anything that should warrant repeating on a certain blog site. So in the next few weeks/months, you might see more of some of our *interesting* conversations or bits that we talk about while we’re at home. Here’s a couple for starters:
P: We should watch Transformers (on Netflix). We could put it on mute and watch Megan Fox run around in her scantily-clad clothing.
B: Let’s put it on…
P: No, it’s too late. We value our sleep too much.
B: Well, she does have ugly thumbs
P: Yeah, but you could just put a paper bag over them…
Stumpy Thumbs! Just call her Butter Thumbs. Everything else is hot, butter thumbs.
And another example:
B: I’ll take half a shot with you
P: No you won’t. You’ll go Eh, Eh, Eh and poopoo it.
B: (laughter) This won’t be nearly as funny tomorrow
P: But it’s funny tonight. Bitches.
So there’s a few examples. I can’t promise that you’ll be able to understand our humor or what’s going on because a lot of it you just have to be there. But we’ll do our best nonetheless.
Me and Brianna were looking at some of her “friends” groups this evening and came across a few doozies that that kind of made us say a collective “Hmm”. Example: “When the Rapture Happens, I Won’t Be Using Facebook” and “Petition to get the sexual ads off the right side of Facebook”. You know, I’ve honestly never thought about that first one, and the second-well, I think that’s why God gave us eyelids. So we can close our eyes and look another direction.
Speaking of God, this stuff kind of makes me wonder what God’s facebook page would look like and what he would think of all this social networking stuff. I would assume that he would think that all of this is pretty obsolete. I mean, I would think that he’s got more friends than all of us. Religious views? Yeah, he believes in himself all right. The biggest question that I have is what would his photo be? Would it be a sunbeam coming through a cloud? Would he be walking on water? If he was a fan of irony, maybe he would post this:
Haha. Very funny God.
The sad thing is is that apparently God IS on facebook, but He only has 3,289,252 fans as of today. Seriously? You can look it up. I think the ‘pickle that has more fans than Nickelback’ has more fans than God. For real? What is this world coming to?! Maybe God will smite us all so that yes, one day, when the rapture comes, we won’t be using facebook. Until then though, keep on sending us those status updates!
