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By Patrick, on November 28th, 2009 You may have noticed that neither myself or Brianna has posted anything in a few days and if you’ve read below, you should understand why. We’ve been a bit busy this past week. Having a baby it seems, takes a fair amount of work and time. But now that we’re one week down, seventeen years and 51 weeks away from giving away legal guardianship of our child, I feel that I can finally get back to posting a few thoughts here and there. Today’s commentary will mostly be about the baby and how cool he is. “Well how cool is
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By Patrick, on November 21st, 2009 So if your reading this then I’m in the hospital. Hopefully, I have already had a baby by the time this post publishes. Worst case scenario I am still in labor. Which would be absolute hell because I have scheduled this to post about 30 hours after we begin a round of Cytotec on Friday. I’m gonna be pissed if I’ve been in labor for 30 hours and I still don’t have a baby.
We are going to try Cytotec because the doctors are PUSHING us to induce. This is our compromise since I’m over 41 weeks and have very
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By Brianna, on November 20th, 2009 Is it because we had a baby? Nope. Unicorns with magical, rainbow-horns were running through our yard? Nope, even better.
We kind of, sorta won a contest. Well not really won a contest…. But we came in the top 12 and we got to use the word bonerflex! I thank Patrick for this genius. And, yes, there were more than twelve participants.
So thanks to The Bloggess’ trip to Japan we almost won! See the very strange contest here.
Yeah, we did just send you to a sex website. Don’t act all prudish, we’ve seen your browser history. :)
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By Patrick, on November 19th, 2009 Me and Brianna were driving today through the bulging metropolis that is Waynesville when we happened upon an interesting sight-an old man with a really long beard riding down the road in a motorized wheelchair. Now, in western North Carolina, this in and of itself is not necessarily that unique. However, the decorative effects of the wheelchair are what really caught our eye. Flying high and proud behind the seat of the chair were two flags-an American flag and….yep, you guessed it, a Confederate one.
As we both realized what we were looking at, we simultaneously said a “Damnit! we
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By Brianna, on November 17th, 2009 Patrick and I live in an older home… try almost 100 years old. You might have heard us complaining mention it before. We are used to all types of dumb shit happening to our house. Ask me sometime about replacing a small portion of drywall only to have 5 lbs of soot and dead bugs fall into my kitchen, via my head. Come on… ASK ME!
However, lately the house has been doing alright. No major issues (currently I am knocking on all available wooden surfaces). Because of this, and the fact I have been cleaning/organizing like a fiend from
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By Patrick, on November 13th, 2009 I thought it was time for another thing that pissed me off; and while I have been guilty of this a very few number of times, I do consciously try not to do it. Of course, I’m talking about talking on the phone while driving. Now don’t get me wrong, I honestly don’t mind people talking on the phone while they’re driving, I only get pissed off when they talk to ME while driving. This is especially mind-blowing when THEY call ME to talk. Now, I understand if I call YOU and you’re driving, that’s understandable.
However, I assume that
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By Brianna, on November 12th, 2009 So, Patrick loudly exclaimed that he just won 900 FreeCell games. At which point I said WTF?
Patrick: I just won 900 games of FreeCell, Bitches!
Brianna: Great (Because I like to give positive feedback even when I’m not really listening), see you should twitter that and it will end up on the blog. (I’m trying to teach him to twitter)
Patrick: Then everyone would know what a dork I am. (pause) You should see how many games my coworker has played.
Brianna: I don’t think it matters how many you’ve played at work… Wait 900? Jesus! How many games
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By Patrick, on November 11th, 2009 You know what I found out today? Your middle fingernail grows faster than all of your other nails. Isn’t that amazing? I’ve wondered all my life about which fingernail grew the fastest, and now I know. And you know who I can thank for this mind-blowing information? Our O.B.’s waiting room. Thanks!
Speaking of doctors, is there a law that doctors’ offices must suck? Actually, I think there is. It’s in Article VIII, paragraph 2, section 6A of the General Statutes of North Carolina: “All physician, dentists, dermatologist, and other healthcare professionals’ office waiting rooms MUST SUCK. Punishment for a
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By Brianna, on November 9th, 2009 We were having a conversation the other day at work and someone thought the fake Dr. Seuss poem about loving your job was so cute. I don’t actually hate my job, but I just can’t help being a little subversive so I pulled up the opposite poem for everyone and while doing that I emailed it to Patrick. Because I just can’t help myself and I knew he would like re-reading this:
I hate my job, I hate the pay! I hate it more and more each day. I hate my boss, she is the worst! I hate her boss
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By Patrick, on November 9th, 2009 Historically speaking, mountain folk tend not to take too kindly to strangers, especially folks from outside the region. This is especially apparent at certain times of the year, mostly in the Spring and during October “leaf-season”. This is when the sputum really hits the fan. Tens of thousands of outsiders stream into the region to enjoy the innate beauty of the surroundings while magically pissing off just about every local with their inane questions, comments and/or behaviors.
A good question-makes one wonder sometimes. In fact, in recent elections, one candidate actually said that another candidate was from Florida-as if that
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